:D

Okay so I'm playing a new game. I've heard of this game a lot before, but Mikey told me to try it, so I did. And it's lots of fun. The game is called O2Jam, which is an online rhythm game (and you know I'm a sucker for rhythm games). The game reminds me a lot of Ez2Dj. O2Jam is free to play, but some things need to be bought using real money, such as more songs, outfits and accessories for your characters, etc. It's very enjoyable heheh.

Speaking of Ez2Dj, it's at its 6th mix already (the last mix I ever played was 2nd), and I really miss playing it. :< I love that game, and I wish Megamall would get one.

J-Zone will hold another J-Cone event (evangelistic ice cream party) on May 20th. :D Looking forward to that too.

In a span of like a week, Style2Ouf.com put out 5 new videos. And it's a big pain to download them lol. x_x Oh well.

Finally, b-boy news. Still working on master swipes. Haven't had much progress. They look more like 2-steps than swipes right now. I think I need more hip action rofl.

Good grief... Pangya Philippines is so underdeveloped. The community is horrible, as people (particularly the newbies) want you to take shots quickly instead of taking good shots. Then they complain if you take your time to think your shot through. Even worse, there doesn't seem to be any penalty for quitting games yet, so they leave whenever they want. Even much worse, my favorite course (North Wiz) isn't implemented yet (but they have Wind Hill, for some reason). I probably won't play here again soon. o_o

Anyway, I'm looking back in FlyFF Philippines. Much has changed since I was last playing there, which was about December of 2005. There's new classes, new items, etc... Dunno much about all the new stuff yet.

There was a dead bird in our pool. It was a baby. They probably had a nest on top of the water tower, then the chick tried to fly, but failed and landed in the water, where it drowned. Sad. :(

Learning swipes and 1990's/2000's. I think 90's will be easier to learn than eclipses. Looks like eclipses take a little more upper body strength than I have (I find it hard to control after a few hops). So while I'm working on my upper body strength, 90's and swipes will have to be learned. :D

Well, I've been thinking of migrating to PangYa Philippines. There are many good reasons to do so, including the ability to buy cookies (because they'll be set up to Philippine Peso rates rather than US$), and the ability to join promotional contests. I may not quit PangYa international for good, but I'll play in the PH server more.

Oh, btw, Crumble Nuts are awesome. I've known this fact for a while now, but I only recently rediscovered them. Ensalada con Jalapeño is good, but I'm wishing it were spicier (like real Jalapeños).

Mikey, Cat, Jess, Mikko and Francis were over at our house last Wednesday. It was supposed to be a pool party, but Mikko didn't get into the pool, for some reason. Anyway, of the group, Francis had to leave within the day, and Mikey had to go to the high school boys camp of JZone at like 4 AM. I learned (or re-learned?) to play Pusoy Dos rofl.

I've started keeping a journal. It'll focus on my spiritual journey in the Christian life. I'm kinda sad that I have terrible penmanship, but as long as I can understand (sorta) what I'm writing, I'll be fine. I'll try to write as legibly as possible heh.

Woohoo. Let it be known that today I finally learned how to swim. Well, basically. I can dog paddle, and travel a bit under water. I'm still learning to float using little energy, like you would if you were shipwrecked.

Easter Sunday tomorrow. :D Let's take this time to appreciate the great sacrifice that God made for us around 2000 years ago. We have to remember that it should've been us on that cross, suffering and dying for our sins.

... for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God. (ROMANS 3:23)

But because Jesus did all that for us already, we don't have to.

"... I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." (JOHN 10:10b)

And everybody that believes in their hearts that Jesus is the Son of God like he said he was, and that he died so that we don't have to die, is very blessed indeed, for they're going to Heaven! :D

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. (JOHN 3:16)

Aha so this stuff is making sense now. Suddenly, what Jesus did sounds more significant. I have to constantly remind myself of the great sacrifice that was made for my sake, even though I don't deserve it. In this way, I remember to love and serve the LORD with all my heart. I admit that I'm not perfect in doing this, but God doesn't mind. He knows very well that I'm not perfect. As long as I give Him my heart, He's happy. I guess that's why I can't help but share some Bible truths whenever I make a blog entry.

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. (2 TIMOTHY 1:7)

I can do everything through him who gives me strength. (PHILIPPIANS 4:13)

I have a bunch of "irrational" fears. You know, the kind of thing that you're afraid of without a logical explanation. For example, I'm scared of spiders. I don't understand why. But even the tiny spiders, I freeze up when I see them. I only know that I always had a fear that maybe a spider is trying to wrap me up and eventually eat me. Even though I know they don't usually do that... I mean, it's never been reported to have happened.

Earlier today (Wednesday) I started learning to get rid of one of my irrational fears. I have a fear of getting water in my ears and nose. It's the fear of how water sounds when you're submerged. Like when you get water in your ears.

I don't understand it, because I remember that when I was 5 or 6 years old, I knew how to swim. I mean, we were at the beach, and I could do butterfly strokes with my cousins all the way across the beach. I don't know when I forgot how to swim, and when I started being afraid of submerging.

As I've said before, our new house has a pool. And it's filled up and ready to use already. So we went in for an evening dip. And, with much mental preparation, Abby helped me get over my fear of being submerged. It's pretty exciting. I even opened my eyes under water. Under water is a lot less visible than I thought it would be.

I have one more major irrational fear, which, by God's grace, I'll get over too. And that's a fear of talking to girls I like. You see, I make friends easily. I can talk to the prettiest of girls, and the most difficult of people, and get along alright. But when it's a girl that I like, I have problems. I freeze up. I know what to say but I can't get my body to perform the necessary motions to actually talk. My mind is racing, and everything goes in slow motion. It feels like I'm standing there for hours, my mouth going dry, and my vision blurring.

What's funny is that my fear isn't really that I'm afraid of being rejected. For instance, I usually am just trying to befriend the girl first. I'm not trying to ask her out, or even ask her name. I just want to start a conversation. So there's very little risk of rejection there.

Oh well. I have over a week more to pray about it, before I get to see the girl that I like again (possibly) at the next Soul Stop.

Listening to: Switchfoot - Learning to Breathe
"I never, never thought that I would fall like that
Never knew I could hurt as bad..."

One thing I noticed is that right after retreat camps, you feel so on fire for the LORD. For the next few days (or sometimes even just one day, or maybe even several weeks), right after the camp, it's like you can't do anything wrong. But sooner or later the fire cools down a bit. And now the hardships (or impossibility) of Christian life begins.

During a retreat camp, we make promises or commitments. Like, we'll give up being rebellious, or lying, or something else. Whatever was our major problem. Satan works in a terribly annoying way, though. Because your defenses are still strong, as you work hard in yourself to fight your problem, instead of attacking that, he'll attack something else that you don't expect. Usually it's little things. Like, if you used to be a compulsive liar, he'll try to make you gluttonous or something. Soon you'll end up with an eating disorder. Then when your defenses are down, you might end up being in denial, then your lying habits might come back.

My personal experience with this was with internet pornography. I wasn't really much into hardcore pornography, but more of softcore anime pornography (AKA "hentai"/'H'/"ecchi"). It's a shameful thing to admit, but by God's grace, I can move past this problem. After the camp last year, I went for weeks without looking at H. I thought I was done with it completely. But I was wrong.

In the next several weeks from then on, I let my guard down on other issues. I became rebellious and disobedient to my parents, and not even in a major way, but in a way that's noticeable. I felt it in myself that whenever I would "obey", I would do so bitterly. I don't think my mom noticed always, but I always did. I also started having many other little problems. And soon, out of my frustration, I ended up being back to my old ways of looking at H.

I frequently asked God for forgiveness of this, and made promises to change my ways. But I always failed to change. I didn't know what I was doing wrong, and no matter what I did, the problem kept showing its ugly face. No matter how hard I tried, I always felt compelled to look at H. I couldn't even understand it. I often felt disgusted by looking at it, and it wasn't even fun anymore -- but I kept doing it anyway. I was a prisoner, and it hurt to know this.

"For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it. So I find this law at work: When I want to do good, evil is right there with me. For in my inner being I delight in God's law; but I see another law at work in the members of my body, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within my members. What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death?" (ROMANS 7:19-24)

At the retreat camp this year, I had to surrender a lot to Christ. I had to surrender everything to Christ. One of the things I surrendered was my computer, including all the things that cause me to stumble on the computer. I had to give up imageboards, because even though I wasn't really looking for H stuff, imageboards kept feeding them to me. I'm also working to cut down on my computer time, because as it was, the computer was also controlling my life. Since around the year 2000, I've been living nocturnally, that is, sleeping in the mornings (I call sleeping at 6 AM "sleeping early", because I usually slept at 8 AM). And all that because I wanted to use the computer.

I'm trying to break free of that control. And by God's grace it seems to be working. My computer belongs to God, and so does my time. My Lord can do with them as he sees fit, and as for me, I will strive to ensure that I don't use them for doing evil.

"But the cowardly, the unbelieving, the vile, the murderers, the sexually immoral, those who practice magic arts, the idolaters and all liars—their place will be in the fiery lake of burning sulfur. This is the second death." (REVELATIONS 21:8)

"But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (ROMANS 5:8)

I strive for this change to glorify God. It's the least I can do for all He's done for me.

The solution, then, would be to always make sure that you cover your bases daily. That is, do your best to have no "weak spots" for Satan to attack. This can be achieved by praying daily (several times a day), purposely asking for protection and guidance.

"Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me." (MATTHEW 16:24)

Remember that we as humans have no power by ourselves, but our God who works in us has all the power, and we claim His victory.

"I have given you authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you." (LUKE 10:19)

We may stumble sometimes, even after all that, but remember:

"Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus,because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death. For what the law was powerless to do in that it was weakened by the sinful nature, God did by sending his own Son in the likeness of sinful man to be a sin offering. And so he condemned sin in sinful man, in order that the righteous requirements of the law might be fully met in us, who do not live according to the sinful nature but according to the Spirit." (ROMANS 8:1-4)

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this not from yourselves, it is the gift of God— not by works, so that no one can boast." (EPHESIANS 2:8-9)

"... know that a man is not justified by observing the law, but by faith in Jesus Christ. So we, too, have put our faith in Christ Jesus that we may be justified by faith in Christ and not by observing the law, because by observing the law no one will be justified." (GALATIANS 2:16)

Take it to the next level? Alright.

We'd just come back from the retreat camp at Caliraya Re-Creation Center (we made it back to CCF around 6:30 PM in fact). Apparently that was the last time we'll see Caliraya, because of a change in their management. But it was a fun 4 days. I think most, if not all, of us felt that the days went by so fast, and that more time would've been appreciated.

Take my relationship with God to the next level? Alright.

I've made some heavy commitments to God. It's not many, but it's enough to cover every aspect of my life. I now realize what I was missing in my Christian life before the camp. I surrendered my sins to Christ, but didn't surrender my life. And without my knowing it, that's why I was lacking. But now that God revealed that stuff to me, I know what steps to take in order to take it to the next level.

How can I do it? I've always failed before!

The difference now, though, is that I won't be doing it on my own. I'll be relying on the Holy Spirit to guide me. It doesn't matter what happens, as long as He's in control.

By the way, congratulations to Cat, who became a Christian and publically declared via baptism it during the camp.

Transfer... 100% Complete!

Actually we finished last Sunday. But I forgot to post then. So I'm doing it now. So far so good in the house. Some guys are working on the pool now (installing stuff like the stairs and a filter I think), and the water tank for water pressure is being fixed too. Other than that it's all good.

I kinda injured myself last Sunday, too. My arm turned in its socket when I was doing stretches for inverts/hollowbacks, then I made the mistake of trying to get into a cartwheel from that position. I didn't really hurt myself, but now it hurts when I try to get into an invert. So I'm going to stop my invert practice for a while, until it heals. Should only take a few weeks.

We're going to apply for a new phone line, hopefully with DSL (still deciding between Bayantel and PLDT). Cable internet is out of the question because we're not in coverage area for ZPDee apparently. Yay broadband. :D